For all of you out there who don't know much about night terrors, it is an uncommon problem for most kids that starts when they are 2-3 and can last as long as until they are 5.
They are characterized by your child seeming to be awake and having them walk around the house, screaming, crying, calling out, hitting, punching, slapping, spiting, scratching, etc. They can't hear you. You can't wake them up. They seem like they are awake, but they aren't. My daughter has absolutely no recollection of them when she wakes up in the morning, even if we have been up all night with her... Her eyes are wide open. She follows the light. She seems awake, but she really isn't. It is real hard to calm her down. She doesn't hear what we say. Usually, it takes about 20-90 minutes to get her back to sleep. On bad nights, she will have them back to back all night. Last night was a killer.
The doctors say that having an irregular bedtime routine contributes to them (being overtired). What I have found is that if our daughter is going through a period of change (new teacher at school, mommy traveling, new people in/out of house, missing cat, slightly different routine), she feels the change more profoundly than most kids and she reacts by having night terrors. The other thing that used to make a difference, but doesn't seem to now based on last night, is that when she slept in our room, she didn't have them. For the first time, she had them in our room which totally blew my mind. Our room has been our safe place, and I don't know what the impetus was for her to feel uncomfortable.
Sure, some nights she is restless and "fighting" all night. I didn't really characterize them as night terrors because she wasn't running around the house.
I am not giving up hope that she will work these things out.
Friday, September 7, 2012
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Rosey glasses
We had the best long weekend. Sofie was attached to my arm in a death grip the whole time, but we managed to get around town alright. Her development has come so far - we were playing with the magnetic etch a sketch yesterday and she wanted me to make a eh-eh-min ... I couldn't figure it out. It sounded like vitamin to me... She laughed at me, dug around in her toy chest and out came the spiderman flashlight. She pointed and said eh-eh-min, and then I laughed, delighted we figured tur how to communicate.
We also went to the jumpa jumpa place (activity place for kids <7) and she made instantaneous friends with another pretty little girl in a pink skirt. They were both jumping on an airpad and tossing little balls/chasing them off the pad like maniacs. Anywhere Sofie went, the little girl followed. I have one charismatic kid! I was so proud of her for making friends so fast with an older girl and handling the situation so well. Also, they have this kiddie sized train that is arm propelled and she loves it. She flies down the tracks so fast and has the best time. I want to remember. When she reallysmiles, I hear birds singing and my heart laughs with her. God I love that kid.
We also went to the jumpa jumpa place (activity place for kids <7) and she made instantaneous friends with another pretty little girl in a pink skirt. They were both jumping on an airpad and tossing little balls/chasing them off the pad like maniacs. Anywhere Sofie went, the little girl followed. I have one charismatic kid! I was so proud of her for making friends so fast with an older girl and handling the situation so well. Also, they have this kiddie sized train that is arm propelled and she loves it. She flies down the tracks so fast and has the best time. I want to remember. When she reallysmiles, I hear birds singing and my heart laughs with her. God I love that kid.
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Homecoming
It was wonderful to be picked up at the airport by my husband and Sofie. This weekend is a holiday in the US, and Sofie's school was off yesterday. My plane was early from Newark, and the family had just pulled into the passenger pickup area when I made it out the door since I didn't check bags. I got a great hug and kiss from my husband, and tossed my carry-on's in the back of the car. I walked over to Sofie's door, opened it, and got the best hug and kiss. As a little surprise for her, I walked over to the other side of the car and sat in the back seat with her the entire way back home. She didn't say a word to me and was just staring at me with a shy smile on her face.
She got a haircut while I was out of town, and she really looks very China doll-like with her blunt bangs and shoulder length bob. I did get her to smile for real and talk a little bit in the car as we soared towards home. At one point, I looked at the speedometer and we were going more than 80... it really was soaring! When we got home, she was as happy as a clam.
It is good to be home with the family. I was pretty jetlagged. The hubby took Sofie to the zoo while I napped after lunch and we had some good dancing sessions before dinner. She crashed in about 10 minutes after 9:10... The hubby doesn't know what I do to get her to sleep so fast. I just sing songs. We have been singing "Somewhere over the Rainbow" and "On the Loose" and she just relaxes when she hears them.
Anyway, she had a rough night. Something chases her in her dreams, and I don't think she hears us trying to help her/reassure her when she is where she goes at night. It breaks my heart. I am not sure what we can do for her environment so she knows she is safe. I wish I could create a protective barrier for her so she has sweet dreams. In the morning, she has no recollection and says she is happy. I wish I could be as reassured in the morning when I have been rocking her screams and tears away for so many hours. She is constantly kicking and slapping away her tormentor. I wonder if teaching her karate during the day would help strengthen her defense at night. I don't know. Suggestions are welcome.
Anyway, today I have been a wreck since I didn't sleep last night, and I had a hard time waking up this morning. They let me sleep in and went swimming/noodling/shopping. The jet lag still has his grips on me for sure. I need to get my stuff together and am glad I have a long weekend to do it.
Have a good one.
She got a haircut while I was out of town, and she really looks very China doll-like with her blunt bangs and shoulder length bob. I did get her to smile for real and talk a little bit in the car as we soared towards home. At one point, I looked at the speedometer and we were going more than 80... it really was soaring! When we got home, she was as happy as a clam.
It is good to be home with the family. I was pretty jetlagged. The hubby took Sofie to the zoo while I napped after lunch and we had some good dancing sessions before dinner. She crashed in about 10 minutes after 9:10... The hubby doesn't know what I do to get her to sleep so fast. I just sing songs. We have been singing "Somewhere over the Rainbow" and "On the Loose" and she just relaxes when she hears them.
Anyway, she had a rough night. Something chases her in her dreams, and I don't think she hears us trying to help her/reassure her when she is where she goes at night. It breaks my heart. I am not sure what we can do for her environment so she knows she is safe. I wish I could create a protective barrier for her so she has sweet dreams. In the morning, she has no recollection and says she is happy. I wish I could be as reassured in the morning when I have been rocking her screams and tears away for so many hours. She is constantly kicking and slapping away her tormentor. I wonder if teaching her karate during the day would help strengthen her defense at night. I don't know. Suggestions are welcome.
Anyway, today I have been a wreck since I didn't sleep last night, and I had a hard time waking up this morning. They let me sleep in and went swimming/noodling/shopping. The jet lag still has his grips on me for sure. I need to get my stuff together and am glad I have a long weekend to do it.
Have a good one.
Monday, August 27, 2012
Made it
I made it to India in one piece last night. It is very tropical - imagine Houston but humid (hahaha)... It is more humid that Houston. I don't know how, but it is. It also reminds me of Jamaica and Malaysia. I didn't see much last night since it was dark except for a lot of wild dogs and a bunch of men out on the town. The women don't roam the streets at night. When I got to the hotel, they said a little prayer for me and put pink dried paint on my third eye. It was cool.
The hotel (renaissance) is very nice. I had a lovely breakfast this morning with my colleague, Ali. We are headed to the office soon to go motivate the team.
I skyped with Sofie and her dad this morning. She was so happy to see me. Apparently she didn't sleep at all last night. Poor baby and poor daddy. I made a couple videos for her at the airport on Sunday and sent them to her dad but he said they made things worse. She played them 60 times each and cried a lot. I hope tonight is better for everyone. Think nice thoughts for them.
Have a wonderful day!
The hotel (renaissance) is very nice. I had a lovely breakfast this morning with my colleague, Ali. We are headed to the office soon to go motivate the team.
I skyped with Sofie and her dad this morning. She was so happy to see me. Apparently she didn't sleep at all last night. Poor baby and poor daddy. I made a couple videos for her at the airport on Sunday and sent them to her dad but he said they made things worse. She played them 60 times each and cried a lot. I hope tonight is better for everyone. Think nice thoughts for them.
Have a wonderful day!
Friday, August 24, 2012
Traveling again
I am traveling to India on Sunday a few months early... We had a last minute situation come up at work, and we need to visit our vendors. I am feeling some trepidation leaving the family because Sofie has been extra needy lately. We believe she has been abused in her past based on certain things that have come up recently and it is going to be hard to leave her. She is feeling extra vulnerable because she was recently moved up a level at preschool (now with the 4 year olds) and none of her friends moved with her. It is a tough situation because we are delighted she is so bright, but she had finally made some good friends at school... We feel for her. Every time she gets comfortable, something changes in her life. I guess this happens pretty regularly in my life too, so I am passing on the uncertainty to her. I hope she can cope.
Since she doesn't have much concept of time yet (now, sometime, sometime in the past) we haven't really talked about the trip yet. My husband thinks I am springing this on her and torturing her because I planned to tell her tomorrow, but I really didn't want to worry her week since she doesn't understand time anyway. I hope she is fine. We have Skype but India is 10.5 hours different in time zone (24 hour trip) and it will be tricky to get her when she is awake.
Anyway, I am feeling some anxiety about leaving her. I will only be gone from Sunday - Friday morning, but it is still hard. I am relieved that there is a 3 day weekend next weekend and I will have some time to recover from the time change. Hopefully there will be pictures. This is the first time for me.
Since she doesn't have much concept of time yet (now, sometime, sometime in the past) we haven't really talked about the trip yet. My husband thinks I am springing this on her and torturing her because I planned to tell her tomorrow, but I really didn't want to worry her week since she doesn't understand time anyway. I hope she is fine. We have Skype but India is 10.5 hours different in time zone (24 hour trip) and it will be tricky to get her when she is awake.
Anyway, I am feeling some anxiety about leaving her. I will only be gone from Sunday - Friday morning, but it is still hard. I am relieved that there is a 3 day weekend next weekend and I will have some time to recover from the time change. Hopefully there will be pictures. This is the first time for me.
Monday, August 20, 2012
Still waters
Sofie had some major accomplishments this week that are note worthy. First, we took her swimming at the Y for the second time ever (first time in pool with me), and Sofie was brave enough to put her head under the water multiple times and blow bubbles. I showed her how to do it once, and she tried it 50-60 times. She also was able to float by putting her hands on the bottom of the pool (1' deep), and her legs went right up. She also floated on her back which was pretty exciting too. She loves the water.
Also, this week, we received notice at her preschool that they are moving her up to the 4 year old age group. I can't believe she would move from the 3 years to the 4 year olds in two months. Her dad is going to discuss it more with the preschool tomorrow to find out what the impetus for this was. She totally IS a smarty pants - can identify all 26 capital letters. She also can read Mickey Mouse and Dinosaur Train. But, I didn't think she was at 4 year old level. That is totally surprising.
Doing the work/life balance things has been tough the last few weeks. We have been getting ready to roll out a new version of software, budget for 2013, and building requirements for the rest of the year. Things are crazy. I am working too much, and now I have a last minute trip to India coming up this weekend. I am hoping that my departure will not create too much disruption in her life (with behavior regression). We have almost gotten to a stable point since all the visitors left. It has been about 4 weeks now, and she finally isn't having night terrors most nights, she has a routine, and she tells us she is feeling happy. I will cross my fingers on this one.
Also, this week, we received notice at her preschool that they are moving her up to the 4 year old age group. I can't believe she would move from the 3 years to the 4 year olds in two months. Her dad is going to discuss it more with the preschool tomorrow to find out what the impetus for this was. She totally IS a smarty pants - can identify all 26 capital letters. She also can read Mickey Mouse and Dinosaur Train. But, I didn't think she was at 4 year old level. That is totally surprising.
Doing the work/life balance things has been tough the last few weeks. We have been getting ready to roll out a new version of software, budget for 2013, and building requirements for the rest of the year. Things are crazy. I am working too much, and now I have a last minute trip to India coming up this weekend. I am hoping that my departure will not create too much disruption in her life (with behavior regression). We have almost gotten to a stable point since all the visitors left. It has been about 4 weeks now, and she finally isn't having night terrors most nights, she has a routine, and she tells us she is feeling happy. I will cross my fingers on this one.
Sunday, August 5, 2012
Happy Days
Happy days are far more preferable to no good, very bad days. I love the mornings where she wakes up and is a ray of sunshine. I can see her dimples when she is radiating joy. Nothing can phase her. She bounces on air. She is very playful and fun. She takes more initiative on these days and tries new things out. She managed to take off her diaper, go potty, and clean herself up this morning. She was so proud. So what if she went commando most of the morning?
She slept all through the night in her own bed. God bless us all. It is amazing what a good night's sleep can give for the family. We had a nice morning snuggling while she drank her bottle and watched a combination of the Olympics and "Little Bill". By the way, I love "Little Bill". The music is my favorite part. It is jazz - real jazz - not the smooth jazz stuff that other people I know like to listen to in the evenings. Sometimes they riff on nursery rhymes. A lot of the time they don't, and I can watch that show forever because the music is so good. Yes, I get the theme song in my head, but it doesn't matter.
She had a melt down at 1:30 and I put her down for a nap by singing about rainbows. She went down really fast (for once) while I was completely mauling "Somewhere over the rainbow". I know we sang that song & other rainbow medleys as part of our sing choir, but I have forgotten most of the words. I made up better ones. LOL.
Apparently, I have joined the ranks of parents who can understand their kids, but no one else can. With her speech impediment, some days are harder than others (zoo sounds a lot like shoe, sew, too, noodles, etc.) but we are getting it. Chocolate sounds a lot more like chocolate these days than "shower" which is what it used to sound like a long time ago. I know I will forget these things and need to write them down to remember. Yesterday, Sofie went to the zoo with her Daddy and they went to the Dinosaur exhibit because she had been pestering her dad for half an hour about it. Apparently, the Dinosaur exhibit has very realistic, lifelike, huge animals that move and make alarming "roaring" sounds. It was a disaster. Our little girl went quietly in her stroller and hid behind her hands while they walked through the park. Even a train ride did nothing to quell her fears. When she got home with him, I asked if they wanted to go to lunch for Noodles (her all time favorite food). She said no. She didn't want dinosaurs. I asked if we should take off her shoes. She said she didn't want dinosaurs. I asked her if she wanted a sandwich. She said that there could be no dinosaurs. You get the picture right? No more dinosaurs for awhile.
I am rambling, but that is where we are at the moment. She is blissfully napping, and I am enjoying a moment of solitude while the hubby enjoys his with the Olympics. Happy Days to you.
She slept all through the night in her own bed. God bless us all. It is amazing what a good night's sleep can give for the family. We had a nice morning snuggling while she drank her bottle and watched a combination of the Olympics and "Little Bill". By the way, I love "Little Bill". The music is my favorite part. It is jazz - real jazz - not the smooth jazz stuff that other people I know like to listen to in the evenings. Sometimes they riff on nursery rhymes. A lot of the time they don't, and I can watch that show forever because the music is so good. Yes, I get the theme song in my head, but it doesn't matter.
She had a melt down at 1:30 and I put her down for a nap by singing about rainbows. She went down really fast (for once) while I was completely mauling "Somewhere over the rainbow". I know we sang that song & other rainbow medleys as part of our sing choir, but I have forgotten most of the words. I made up better ones. LOL.
Apparently, I have joined the ranks of parents who can understand their kids, but no one else can. With her speech impediment, some days are harder than others (zoo sounds a lot like shoe, sew, too, noodles, etc.) but we are getting it. Chocolate sounds a lot more like chocolate these days than "shower" which is what it used to sound like a long time ago. I know I will forget these things and need to write them down to remember. Yesterday, Sofie went to the zoo with her Daddy and they went to the Dinosaur exhibit because she had been pestering her dad for half an hour about it. Apparently, the Dinosaur exhibit has very realistic, lifelike, huge animals that move and make alarming "roaring" sounds. It was a disaster. Our little girl went quietly in her stroller and hid behind her hands while they walked through the park. Even a train ride did nothing to quell her fears. When she got home with him, I asked if they wanted to go to lunch for Noodles (her all time favorite food). She said no. She didn't want dinosaurs. I asked if we should take off her shoes. She said she didn't want dinosaurs. I asked her if she wanted a sandwich. She said that there could be no dinosaurs. You get the picture right? No more dinosaurs for awhile.
I am rambling, but that is where we are at the moment. She is blissfully napping, and I am enjoying a moment of solitude while the hubby enjoys his with the Olympics. Happy Days to you.
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