So, on Sunday, I had like 30 minutes in a row to shower & groom myself (Note: Since I became a mom, even the most mundane tasks like taking care of my eyebrows seem to be a challenge)... anyway, I came downstairs afterwards and all the chairs around the kitchen table were running 90 degrees off to the table, facing the back wall. Sofie & her dad were wearing shoes and backpacks and pretending to fly on planes to visit Grandma & Grandpa. I saw it, heard her making the zooming sounds of a plane flying, saw her jump up, smile, exclaim "Hi Grandma! Hi Grandpa! I missed you. I am so glad to see you. I love you. Bye".. She and her dad took the trip many times that afternoon and it warmed my heart. Apparently, she bullied Espen into putting the backpack and shoes on. She also sat him on the plane. I love that little girl. I had to share.
Also, my hubby and I had a date on Sun night, and I got ready for it. Sofie was so excited, she had to get dressed up too. She picked out her favorite dress, put it on carefully, found her necklaces, put them on, followed me into the bathroom and watched me apply makeup. She was standing so still & watching so intently, I couldn't resist asking her if she wanted some makeup too. I put some aqua eye liner on her top lids, giving her cat eyes. It matched her dress even. She looked so beautiful. Then we did some fun hair stuff for her too. After we walked downstairs, she put on these "platform" espadrille sandals & picked up this very small metal lunchbox for her purse & was ready to go. She was accessorized to the max. We all looked like a million bucks on the way to the babysitter. It was priceless.
Tonight, our visitors came back and are staying for an indeterminate amount of time (why oh why can't my husband just ask). Sofie and I had a quiet night, and she was playing a lot while I folded the mountain of laundry that intimidates my hubby. I got her to help me fold a twin sheet the right way. Then she discovered that sheets make excellent parachutes, and we had a ball. There was hide and seek. There was wind. There was giggling. There was tickling. It was such a great stress reliever after a very long day with grumpy people. How did I get so lucky? She even fell asleep early tonight. Bliss.
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Home without visitors/travel/etc
This is the first weekend in a very, very long time (months and months) where:
1) We have no visitors staying in the house
2) I am not leaving the country/traveling
3) I am not coming home from international travel
4) We have no visitors arriving tomorrow (they are coming on Wednesday, LOL).
5) No one is sick... except if you don't count my hubby having back probs
6) None of the combinations above are happening at the same time
It is a nice thing to have the house to ourselves. My hubby took pity on me and let me take a nap today from 11 - 2:30. It was amazing. I got sleep. It was amazing. He took Sofie to the grocery and I got some peace and quiet. It rained so hard while I napped that it woke me up (and I was feeling bad for Pita because she was outside) but I didn't feel bad enough to go out searching for the cat. The hubby told me that it didn't rain where he was, so that was good too. I was feeling bad he was carting around Sofie in the rain, but it was ok. Oh, and the house didn't flood. Also good. Some parts of Houston got 14 inches in 24 hours (YIKES) and I am glad it wasn't us.
My carpal tunnel is acting up, I believe due to the last month of crazy work schedules. I got a massage last week and my therapist told me that I need to make sure I stand up every hour and stretch for a couple minues... I tend to go 6 hours without moving I think and it isn't so good for the body. I have some bad spots in my left shoulder, right elbow, ribs, lower back and right hand. This week I tried to take it more easy, remembered to set an alarm to go off every hour a couple of the days, and the hubby put pressure on me to come home after 10 hours. I made that one 3 out of 5 days which was a big improvement over the last couple months. It is hard to balance work, Sofie, him and myself. I struggle big time.
Sofie has been wonderful this week. When she smiles completely, I see her heart & her happiness and everything is worth it. It makes my heart smile too. Real, honest to goodness, legitimate smiles. She is amazing. We had a super special day on Tuesday where we made chocolate chip cookies (learned ingredients, measures, stirring, sneaking bites out of the bowl, portioning out on cookie sheet, baking, cooling, etc.). It was awesome. Then we did some very cool dancing to "Water Music"and Sofie showed off her BREAK DANCING skills. She is too cool for our house! I need to get her enrolled in dance classes this fall. She scooted her little butt in a circle while her legs propelled her around. She also jumped forward on one arm and kicked both legs in the air (and didn't fall over). Way too coordinated. Did I mention that the hubby taught her to drop kick a size 4 soccer ball in the house this week? We had a narrow miss with my coffee this morning. She has the best fine motor skills ever. I say this while she has the most bruised legs i have ever seen because the practicing to do this show boating for mommy has taken its toll on her little body.
What else? She is talking more and more. It is amazing. She is working on "t's" and "d's" with the speech therapist (really hard). She can't say "c" or "k" sounds yet. Her p, b, and q sounds are great. S, f, and j are good too. Did I mention before that she is talking in full sentences (and sounds just like me?!?!?!)? Does everyone groan when they hear certain phrases coming out of their kid's mouths that sounds very groan up? Not cursing, but just situational stuff? It makes me laugh and shake my head. I love that kid.
Hope you have a good one.
1) We have no visitors staying in the house
2) I am not leaving the country/traveling
3) I am not coming home from international travel
4) We have no visitors arriving tomorrow (they are coming on Wednesday, LOL).
5) No one is sick... except if you don't count my hubby having back probs
6) None of the combinations above are happening at the same time
It is a nice thing to have the house to ourselves. My hubby took pity on me and let me take a nap today from 11 - 2:30. It was amazing. I got sleep. It was amazing. He took Sofie to the grocery and I got some peace and quiet. It rained so hard while I napped that it woke me up (and I was feeling bad for Pita because she was outside) but I didn't feel bad enough to go out searching for the cat. The hubby told me that it didn't rain where he was, so that was good too. I was feeling bad he was carting around Sofie in the rain, but it was ok. Oh, and the house didn't flood. Also good. Some parts of Houston got 14 inches in 24 hours (YIKES) and I am glad it wasn't us.
My carpal tunnel is acting up, I believe due to the last month of crazy work schedules. I got a massage last week and my therapist told me that I need to make sure I stand up every hour and stretch for a couple minues... I tend to go 6 hours without moving I think and it isn't so good for the body. I have some bad spots in my left shoulder, right elbow, ribs, lower back and right hand. This week I tried to take it more easy, remembered to set an alarm to go off every hour a couple of the days, and the hubby put pressure on me to come home after 10 hours. I made that one 3 out of 5 days which was a big improvement over the last couple months. It is hard to balance work, Sofie, him and myself. I struggle big time.
Sofie has been wonderful this week. When she smiles completely, I see her heart & her happiness and everything is worth it. It makes my heart smile too. Real, honest to goodness, legitimate smiles. She is amazing. We had a super special day on Tuesday where we made chocolate chip cookies (learned ingredients, measures, stirring, sneaking bites out of the bowl, portioning out on cookie sheet, baking, cooling, etc.). It was awesome. Then we did some very cool dancing to "Water Music"and Sofie showed off her BREAK DANCING skills. She is too cool for our house! I need to get her enrolled in dance classes this fall. She scooted her little butt in a circle while her legs propelled her around. She also jumped forward on one arm and kicked both legs in the air (and didn't fall over). Way too coordinated. Did I mention that the hubby taught her to drop kick a size 4 soccer ball in the house this week? We had a narrow miss with my coffee this morning. She has the best fine motor skills ever. I say this while she has the most bruised legs i have ever seen because the practicing to do this show boating for mommy has taken its toll on her little body.
What else? She is talking more and more. It is amazing. She is working on "t's" and "d's" with the speech therapist (really hard). She can't say "c" or "k" sounds yet. Her p, b, and q sounds are great. S, f, and j are good too. Did I mention before that she is talking in full sentences (and sounds just like me?!?!?!)? Does everyone groan when they hear certain phrases coming out of their kid's mouths that sounds very groan up? Not cursing, but just situational stuff? It makes me laugh and shake my head. I love that kid.
Hope you have a good one.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Miracles?
The unimaginable happened this afternoon. The hubby started talking about wanting to add another child to our family. To be honest, I didn't see it coming. He has been quasi-overwhelmed by the addition of Sofie to our family, and his friends that are visiting have been putting the pressure on adding a 2nd child to the mix. He sees how well she plays with the other children and thinks she could be lonely and really want another brother or sister, and he is willing to do it for her.
When we first got Sofie I was ready to start the paperwork. Now, I don't know which country we would get another child from and how we would pay for it. I don't know. Will ponder this weekend.
When we first got Sofie I was ready to start the paperwork. Now, I don't know which country we would get another child from and how we would pay for it. I don't know. Will ponder this weekend.
Holiday
We have had some friends of my husband arrive this week, and it has completely changed the dynamic of the house. It is one of his best friends in the world, his wife, and their 2 kids who are 7 & 9. Sofie took about 4 hours to warm up to the girls, and now they are best friends. It amazes me that the kids can play together while still speaking different languages (Norwegian vs English/Chinese). My conversational Norwegian is pretty rusty, and I am working on it. The adults do speak a bit of English, but they really want to speak Norwegian because you know.. they are from Norway. Why would you speak a different language to your husband & husband's friend, right? It was totally crazy when they first got her on Monday because I had just returned from Paris, and I could remember no words. What came out when I tried to talk was a smattering of English, French, Spanish and Norwegian, with the occasional Chinese for good measure. I have swiss cheese for brains.
Anyway, I have everyone fooled that I understand what the *blink* they are talking about - ok - sometimes I do- but after 6 hours I just get a headache and need to hide out. Yesterday was long. I took today and tomorrow off too so I could spend some quality time with the family and I am not sure how I am going to make it through. I need to just stop being a baby and get on with it.
The good news is that Sofie wants to be just like the other grown up girls, and so she has moved forward again with her eating/temper tantrums/sleeping/etc. To be honest, with 2 grown up girls, she is having the time of her life keeping up with them. If one feels worn out, she can just be active with the other one. Totally ideal situation.
Anyway, headed to Galveston. Have a nice weekend.
Anyway, I have everyone fooled that I understand what the *blink* they are talking about - ok - sometimes I do- but after 6 hours I just get a headache and need to hide out. Yesterday was long. I took today and tomorrow off too so I could spend some quality time with the family and I am not sure how I am going to make it through. I need to just stop being a baby and get on with it.
The good news is that Sofie wants to be just like the other grown up girls, and so she has moved forward again with her eating/temper tantrums/sleeping/etc. To be honest, with 2 grown up girls, she is having the time of her life keeping up with them. If one feels worn out, she can just be active with the other one. Totally ideal situation.
Anyway, headed to Galveston. Have a nice weekend.
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Priorities and moving forward
I just returned home from a 1 week visit in Paris, and it was hard. I left the husband and Sofie at home. It broke my heart to hear about how sad they were while I was away.
Since I have gotten home, Sofie is happy. But, there has been regression in behavior. The first thing that goes is always night-time/nap-time potty training. I don't understand it. I have read about i and the specialists say that we shouldn't worry until she turns 5 but she was so potty trained in China. It is completely weird. Today, she didn't even take much of a nap and she still wet the diaper. Also, she is crying any time anything doesn't go her way, which was how it was when we first got her. I am trying not to lose my temper with her expression of frustration and continue to be as loving as I can. I know it has been hard for her.
When I was in Paris, I met this interesting colleague who was enthralled with my story of adoption, and she had lots of questions. It was like she looked deep within my soul, and she tried to give me advice of what she had learned on her journey with her 2 sons. She talked a lot about the typical company profile and how it tends to recruit hard working, challenge loving junkies who have a hard time setting limits and saying "no". I totally meet that criteria and have been an over-working fool over the last 15 years.
Anyway, she said that she had seen a lot of new mothers get burned out as a result of their inability to set limits and that she herself had struggled with it when she was a new mom. She recommended that I think about what my limits are and how to make sure that I respect them. It was a timely discussion (I don't doubt that this is higher intelligence trying to keep me on track) and I do feel like I have been out of control. I have been working 12 hour days regularly in the 4 months I am back, and the upcoming travel schedule for Q3 is gruesome. Also, we are going to be commercializing our new software and there is potential to work 16 hour days every day to make things work.
Every time I leave home, Sofie suffers at the moment, and I wonder if I need to give her more mommy time so she feels more secure. I don't know what the long term ramifications of my traveling & the adoption will be (will she always feel abandoned because I leave her regularly)? How can I balance the needs of my child with the needs of my job with the needs of my husband and my needs? It seems exceptionally tricky. I am not good at having limits - as seen by my numerous knee surgeries, bad joints, pinched nerves and achievement driven success. How can I put them on myself and remain an outstanding member of the team delivering what the company needs? How can I say "no"? Can I say "no" and still respect myself? I am struggling with these questions at the moment.
Meanwhile, our next round of visitors is arriving tomorrow (a Norwegian family of 4) who is staying off and on for a couple weeks. We are unaware of what their English level is and I am feeling a bit of trepidation about it, but what can I do but seize the day and go with the flow (and drink?)?
Oh wait, they don't drink. What on earth will we do together? LOL. I am kidding. I have reduced the sauce significantly since Sofie came into our life. I just don't feel as compelled to drink it, and I have been on a bit of a health improvement kick for months. I became a vegetarian about a month and a half ago (some days are better than others; being a vegetarian in Paris is nearly impossible)... Anyway, respecting my body and feeding it better fuel has been part of my health kick which means less alcohol, though I do have the occasional margarita. Boy, this turned into a rambling about alcohol.
Anyway, what to do? Where is the balance? How can I do it? I need your love and support to make it so.
All my best.
Since I have gotten home, Sofie is happy. But, there has been regression in behavior. The first thing that goes is always night-time/nap-time potty training. I don't understand it. I have read about i and the specialists say that we shouldn't worry until she turns 5 but she was so potty trained in China. It is completely weird. Today, she didn't even take much of a nap and she still wet the diaper. Also, she is crying any time anything doesn't go her way, which was how it was when we first got her. I am trying not to lose my temper with her expression of frustration and continue to be as loving as I can. I know it has been hard for her.
When I was in Paris, I met this interesting colleague who was enthralled with my story of adoption, and she had lots of questions. It was like she looked deep within my soul, and she tried to give me advice of what she had learned on her journey with her 2 sons. She talked a lot about the typical company profile and how it tends to recruit hard working, challenge loving junkies who have a hard time setting limits and saying "no". I totally meet that criteria and have been an over-working fool over the last 15 years.
Anyway, she said that she had seen a lot of new mothers get burned out as a result of their inability to set limits and that she herself had struggled with it when she was a new mom. She recommended that I think about what my limits are and how to make sure that I respect them. It was a timely discussion (I don't doubt that this is higher intelligence trying to keep me on track) and I do feel like I have been out of control. I have been working 12 hour days regularly in the 4 months I am back, and the upcoming travel schedule for Q3 is gruesome. Also, we are going to be commercializing our new software and there is potential to work 16 hour days every day to make things work.
Every time I leave home, Sofie suffers at the moment, and I wonder if I need to give her more mommy time so she feels more secure. I don't know what the long term ramifications of my traveling & the adoption will be (will she always feel abandoned because I leave her regularly)? How can I balance the needs of my child with the needs of my job with the needs of my husband and my needs? It seems exceptionally tricky. I am not good at having limits - as seen by my numerous knee surgeries, bad joints, pinched nerves and achievement driven success. How can I put them on myself and remain an outstanding member of the team delivering what the company needs? How can I say "no"? Can I say "no" and still respect myself? I am struggling with these questions at the moment.
Meanwhile, our next round of visitors is arriving tomorrow (a Norwegian family of 4) who is staying off and on for a couple weeks. We are unaware of what their English level is and I am feeling a bit of trepidation about it, but what can I do but seize the day and go with the flow (and drink?)?
Oh wait, they don't drink. What on earth will we do together? LOL. I am kidding. I have reduced the sauce significantly since Sofie came into our life. I just don't feel as compelled to drink it, and I have been on a bit of a health improvement kick for months. I became a vegetarian about a month and a half ago (some days are better than others; being a vegetarian in Paris is nearly impossible)... Anyway, respecting my body and feeding it better fuel has been part of my health kick which means less alcohol, though I do have the occasional margarita. Boy, this turned into a rambling about alcohol.
Anyway, what to do? Where is the balance? How can I do it? I need your love and support to make it so.
All my best.
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
7 months now, Baby
It's been awhile. Time just rushes by in a blink of an eye. I don't know how long it has been since I wrote - too long.
We had a nice trip home to see family a couple weeks ago. Sofie is in love with her cousin and they were awesome together, holding hands, running through sprinklers, pointing at huge bigger-than-life bugs... We never could get a good picture of them together, but they look just like those greeting cards with the kids holding hands. My sister in law commented that it would be funny if they got married. I am just happy to see those kids so happy. I am relieved that Sofie can be so happy since the transition has had its ups and downs.
Sofie also enjoyed seeing grandma, grandpa, the great-grandmas, great-grandpa, aunts, uncles, cousins, 2nd cousins, great aunts/uncles, etc. It was a good time. She slept through the night after the first night of night terrors. She loves airplanes. She is that kid on the plane I used to curse about who screams her head off and bounces. She is a kicker too. After the people in front of us reclined 100% for a 2 hour flight, I didn't care anymore. Chocolate kept her at bay for part of the flight but by the time we got home, she was WIRED!
Today is the official start of month 7. I can't believe this transition. She is joyous during the day most of the time. She is as smart as a whip according to unnamed house guests with recent 2 & 3 year old exposure. She also has been assessed by a kindergarten teacher relative who is very impressed with Sofie's fine motor & counting skills. She has been moved to age appropriate kindergarten. She continues to grow up. Her hair is positively stunning. Her language skills are getting pretty good. We still need the speech therapy, but we understand her a lot more of the time. The other day, she shocked the heck out of us when she said clearly, "Mommy, I need medicine! PAIN medicine..." (we were trying to figure out where she got that, and my mom takes credit because she had rotator cuff/ruptured biceps surgery twice (long story) last month and was liking the pain meds while we were home)...
It totally floored us.
She has totally taken to our houseguest for these last 2 weeks and has the best time with him. He has a 3 year old at home and says that they couldn't be more different. He plays with Sofie for hours, but he is looking forward to going home where his daughter is less active and watches tv. Sofie wears him out.
The night terrors are intermittent. I am trying different techniques but their frequency does seem to depend partially on how tired she is. Hopefully they will pass. Last night I got 6 consecutive hours of sleep before she woke up (unbelievable... it has been 7 months since that happened!), and I didn't know what to do with myself at 4 am when she woke up and cried. I thought about doing yoga, reading a book, exercising, walking, going to work early... and laid there for a whole other hour fantasizing... LOL. until I drifed off to sleep, and then my alarm went off.
I am enamored with this kid and am so thankful we got matched. Yes, she has her funny things ("Mommy, I need medicine..." she says this a few times a day.... I have slipped her fresh vegetable juice, ginger juice, tictacs, vitamins, kefir, and fruit juice under the guise of medicine since she is so relentless in her quest...) but she is awesome and I am so glad we got her. I believe in fate & miracles & the power of good.
I am headed to France in a couple days and don't know how THAT transition will go because my trip is longer than last time, but hopefully we will skype and everything will be ok.
Hugs to all. Peace out.
We had a nice trip home to see family a couple weeks ago. Sofie is in love with her cousin and they were awesome together, holding hands, running through sprinklers, pointing at huge bigger-than-life bugs... We never could get a good picture of them together, but they look just like those greeting cards with the kids holding hands. My sister in law commented that it would be funny if they got married. I am just happy to see those kids so happy. I am relieved that Sofie can be so happy since the transition has had its ups and downs.
Sofie also enjoyed seeing grandma, grandpa, the great-grandmas, great-grandpa, aunts, uncles, cousins, 2nd cousins, great aunts/uncles, etc. It was a good time. She slept through the night after the first night of night terrors. She loves airplanes. She is that kid on the plane I used to curse about who screams her head off and bounces. She is a kicker too. After the people in front of us reclined 100% for a 2 hour flight, I didn't care anymore. Chocolate kept her at bay for part of the flight but by the time we got home, she was WIRED!
Today is the official start of month 7. I can't believe this transition. She is joyous during the day most of the time. She is as smart as a whip according to unnamed house guests with recent 2 & 3 year old exposure. She also has been assessed by a kindergarten teacher relative who is very impressed with Sofie's fine motor & counting skills. She has been moved to age appropriate kindergarten. She continues to grow up. Her hair is positively stunning. Her language skills are getting pretty good. We still need the speech therapy, but we understand her a lot more of the time. The other day, she shocked the heck out of us when she said clearly, "Mommy, I need medicine! PAIN medicine..." (we were trying to figure out where she got that, and my mom takes credit because she had rotator cuff/ruptured biceps surgery twice (long story) last month and was liking the pain meds while we were home)...
It totally floored us.
She has totally taken to our houseguest for these last 2 weeks and has the best time with him. He has a 3 year old at home and says that they couldn't be more different. He plays with Sofie for hours, but he is looking forward to going home where his daughter is less active and watches tv. Sofie wears him out.
The night terrors are intermittent. I am trying different techniques but their frequency does seem to depend partially on how tired she is. Hopefully they will pass. Last night I got 6 consecutive hours of sleep before she woke up (unbelievable... it has been 7 months since that happened!), and I didn't know what to do with myself at 4 am when she woke up and cried. I thought about doing yoga, reading a book, exercising, walking, going to work early... and laid there for a whole other hour fantasizing... LOL. until I drifed off to sleep, and then my alarm went off.
I am enamored with this kid and am so thankful we got matched. Yes, she has her funny things ("Mommy, I need medicine..." she says this a few times a day.... I have slipped her fresh vegetable juice, ginger juice, tictacs, vitamins, kefir, and fruit juice under the guise of medicine since she is so relentless in her quest...) but she is awesome and I am so glad we got her. I believe in fate & miracles & the power of good.
I am headed to France in a couple days and don't know how THAT transition will go because my trip is longer than last time, but hopefully we will skype and everything will be ok.
Hugs to all. Peace out.
Monday, June 4, 2012
Walking like elephants
Tonight was superb fun. Sofie and I played with the etch-a-sketch... First I did letter ID with her. Then she flexed her drawing muscles and drew mommy, daddy,the cats, kailan & friends, etc. then, I was thinking about yoga and we did table pose. That turned into pretending to be elephants, monkeys, tigers, dogs, horses, and some other animal that she keeping saying over and over that sounded like 'tin' and had rolling hand motions, jumping up and down, spinning, and lots of shouting. Even her Dad joined in the fun. We laughed until we fell over. magic!
Then, Sofie made us snacks in her kitchen. She wouldn't let her Dad and me eat from the same pot, and the kettle was boiling for 20 minutes at least. It was a riot.
We have the best little girl. She is a hoot and a half and is talking more every day. Also, at preschool they moved her up to the 3-4 year olds (she was a year behind to learn language) and after only 2 months she is in her age bracket. Amazing!
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